I’ve been meaning to post a video blog about moms and work, since I find its yet another contentious topic that comes up among other mothers. Some of the symptoms are similar to depression, anxiety, and dissociation. Katrina Alcorn. She would suggest that I was spending too much time picking up the kids and why couldn’t my wife do it? I’d forgotten about the hives. I sincerely hope your situation … “You take care of yours and I’ll take care of mine” and “why should I have to pay taxes to pay for your (enter social need here).”. “I can’t do this anymore,” I said, my voice cracking. I think I am having one. I say to you,I definitely get annoyed while people think about worrries But this gets back to the beginning of this whole problem, that it is our society that is driving women to this point of breakdown, not the flaws, insecurities and weaknesses of the women themselves. I closed my eyes and saw him, unshaven, leaning heavily on his elbows at the kitchen table, the phone pressed tightly to his ear, while our son Jake toddled after his sisters, whose squeals I could hear in the background. The phone rang regularly with invitations to parties and dinners and plays. Katrina–I posted under the Warning Bells post about my experience, but in brief: I used to work 60 hours/week freelance, and did not even take maternity leave during labor or on the birth days of my children. I felt that the anti-depressants would just be a Band-Aid. On the typical day of a working mom during the pandemic. “No, I can do it.” “I’m fine, I can take care of it.” Then I think I have to help everyone–not just the kids, but the husband, the widower dad, the 2nd career-searching brother, PTO, church, etc. I generally don’t talk too much about my kids in the work setting. Such a great and honest exploration of what so many of us have experienced. Nervous breakdown symptoms. I literally pushed myself to a point where my nervous system stopped working the way it’s supposed to. (Part IV. I am 25 and I have a 2-year-old daughter. It should be noted that although many people classify a nervous breakdown as a mental breakdown a nervous breakdown is merely a subtype of mental breakdown that involves intense feelings of anxiety and stress this is what causes us to react with our nerves and we feel nervous. ... An online survey by Working Mother Magazine found that a whopping 91 percent of working moms who took the survey had experienced depression. It was horrifying to realize I’d let that happen. JUSTIN LONG guest stars as her date, Adam. I thought two weeks off work would 'solve' me but it took many months to get even slightly better. Career, house, husband, baby, dog, car, family…and none if it feels “right”. I really think that may be at the crux of the problem. I tell myself people have it much worse. My sister and I talk over the phone when we can, and she mentioned that maybe it is normal as a mother to feel this way, but yes, in this case I have fallen off the cliff, and I am slowly climbing back up. Some days, you’re going to have to give more to your job and the kids will eat a pepperoni pizza for dinner (and possibly the next morning for breakfast)—and that’s okay. Does anyone have any advice on getting back in touch with the Lord? She helped me with my son’s graduation party (yes, he made it! (that story comes from five years ago). Like me, they all assumed there was something wrong with them.”. My short answer is that I have been able to carve a niche for myself, working part time from home as a web consultant and I’ve never been happier, but it certainly came with trade offs. And hiding from the threat of the entire world crashing down around me for what feels like as long as I can remember (or at least since getting pregnant over 6 years ago). How it got this way) | Working Moms Break, Random: Jane, the White House, and this blog, Survey: 88% of Working Parents Suffer Stress-related Health Problems, 10 Reasons It’s Easier to Be a Working Mom in France. I also liked that you mentioned that you are trying to remember how blessed you are, as well as trying to enjoy life. That job was certainly not easy and I worked my butt off then, too. No surgery. Working Moms on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown. It’s was very helpful for me to sort out where to begin to untangle this mess of mine. But the stress lives on. He taught me what I didn’t want to be, and he caused me to be a stronger woman. I am in my early 50s and am looking to return to work after a nervous breakdown and 6 months away from work. New parents and working parents sure have a lot of tough yet rewarding life adjustments to make. It feels like I’m trying to wear shoes that are one size too small. I couldn’t get my body to obey what my mind kept saying it should do. Is that really how it’s supposed to be? I felt that this was very un-thorough and I have yet to make a new appointment. We live in the care of her father, who is my boyfriend, yet we are not married. I still have some residual anxiety that things could fall apart again. My husband, Brian, was home with our one-year-old, Jake, our six-year-old, Ruby, and our eight-year-old, Martha (my stepdaughter). I suffer with anxiety and depression anyway but this lack of sleep is causing me to now have panic attacks so I definitely feel ‘ close to the edge’. Favourite answer. I read your first post at work (on my iPhone, in the bathroom, between meetings!) I feel like there’s a giant X on my back now, and I’m just trying to live my life like the rest of us. People suffering from burnout often experience … I consider myself a full-time mom, housekeeper, and I am a full-time student taking courses online for my AS degree in Health Science. The following factors may have caused or contributed to your meltdown.. The term was frequently used in the past to cover a variety of mental disorders, but it's no longer used by mental health professionals today. Although “nervous breakdown” does not necessarily have a rigorous or static definition, surveys of laypersons suggest that the term refers to a specific acute time-limited reactive disorder, involving symptoms such as anxiety or depression, usually precipitated by external stressors. This will be over soon, I thought. The more that I consider the problem the more it seems to me that it partly comes down to community. I was at a trade show at 33 weeks, and everyone was commenting that it’s amazing I was there (in Atlanta, in the middle of the summer) working, much less getting on a plane. I was thinking about this recently after reading some of Tolstoy’s short stories, written mid 1800s, and he described women as being totally strung out in child-raising (and they had tons of servants too! I am not in work enough to be able to do a good job and I am not at home enough to be able manage the house and look after our one and two year olds. Also, I am not perfect, and I never will be. By undermining their severity, they can develop into a nervous breakdown. I could hear the concern in his voice. I was shocked by how long it took for me to start feeling like myself, and still, I don’t think my nervous system is resilient like it once was. A nervous breakdown at work is nothing to take lightly. Sept. 19, 2013, 5:48 PM UTC. A mental breakdown, also known as a nervous breakdown, is a mental disorder that can plague you for a short amount of time when youre dealing with too much stress. I just finished Katrina Alcorn’s gripping memoir, Maxed Out, about her nervous breakdown. I’d love to hear what other people say about it. It is no wonder that you got embarrassed discussing your breakdown on national radio. My three year old is sweet and precious and precocious and potty-training and wild. The suspected risk factors of having a nervous breakdown may develop from having pertinacious work stress, anxiety disorders, financial issues, divorce or a family history of mental disorders. “Moms were a powerful force in this election. I am a school teacher with two young boys and I constantly feel emotionally and physically drained. Share via facebook ... Katrina Alcorn, mum of 3 and author of Maxed Out: American Moms on the Brink, believes that many working mums are hanging on by a thread. I think maybe I have had episodes of a breakdown during which time I would abuse prescription drugs and alcohol while still functioning as a normal human being (at least on the outside). I’ll be back to get some inspiration from you. In order to not have a nervous breakdown, you have to put things in perspective. by Katrina on March 24, 2010. I felt and still feel a great sense of relief. And yes, it’s so mysterious how they come on so violently and then leave without a trace. Your honesty about what you went through is so brave, and it helps other working moms know we are not the only ones suffering in our attempts to balance it all and meet everyone’s needs and demands. Then my last parent died. And moms that don’t work often say things like “I’m so glad I get to spend this precious time with her/him.” Just seems to me like everyone’s trying to justify their position and there’s very little actual talk that goes on about what we, as mothers, WANT. I didn’t take the time to read the comments, because I have no time. Share via facebook; Share via twitter; Share via whatsapp ; SMS Share via SMS; Share via e-mail; Leave a comment. quitting, I need to return to work desperately for financial reasons. So now I am paying attention to my body and how I respond to stress and hectic situations. Plenty of us have a lot on our plates at home and work as well, and the kids with school, making sure that they get all of their assignments done on time can be a bit of a drain, to say the least. 2 […] As promised, I continue here the list of questions for my prospective nanny – and the reasons for every question. Katrina- I just don’t get it. "Panic attacks can be a warning sign, especially … I mean really – is it so difficult to see that maybe, just maybe it is a good idea for EVERYONE in the wealthiest country the world has ever known to have affordable access to health care? The fear was enormous and it’s even kind of uncomfortable to talk about it now. Katrina, I am so glad you told me about your blog and I LOVE it. After acknowledging the potential of underlying mental health issues, residential treatment is the next step needed to learn how to cope with them. I’m hoping to can share with me your secrets for recovery from your nervous breakdown as I obviously have that right now. At least this time the kids weren’t in the car. My brain chemistry had, apparently, short-circuited from stress. If I could have, I would have just laid on the kitchen floor and cry for days. Kidding. Thank you thank you thank you. My friend Holly calls this “comparing our insides to other people’s outsides.” Sometimes we do ourselves and others a disservice by pretending everything is just fine. I am slightly a perfectionist and I am stubborn. I would love to think that that was true, but I feel guilty of putting more time into my schooling than I do with her (I have maintained a 4.0 during the last 2 1/2 years of community college). Your stories are compelling and your insights are sharp. I don’t even drink that much, but now I totally avoid alcohol altogether. (I guess it’s hard to find women who will admit, on air, with 500,000 to 1 million people listening, that they had a breakdown trying to do it all, although there are plenty of us out … It’s true that I played it down. I was embarrassed. Thanks for putting your insides out there. I am thinking of going to a therapist for anti-deppressants, but they scare me. They wanted to keep me because I busted my a$$ for them, but I could not stand that this company had no sympathy for moms, or even pregnant women, which makes up the majority of their workers. Pretending you can do it all on your own (including my cousin Logan who had TWO sets of TWINS within TWO YEARS–yikes!). My friend Jane* has a problem. “It’s time to quit,” he said. I didn’t plan to stop going to the job I’d had for the last six years. I first thought that they were from driving (my boyfriend drove, and I was the passenger) for six hours in the heavy holiday traffic from northern California down. I feel like I have no purpose sometimes, but I know that isn’t true. Congratulations on being able to find help so quickly and confidently. That was was over a year ago and I’m still not really over it. Fortunately, I went to my doctor and after knowing me for 14 years she convinced me that I needed something to help me cope. But I’m not like you. OMG!!! His collaborator, “Jane,” wanted to invite me to be part of an advisory group for a project that Joe and Jane both worked on. I’d like to say that I was strong and quit on my own, but really, I am just too scared! I didn’t actually feel normal. My closest friends said I downplayed my nervous breakdown, making it sound like a really bad day (instead of a really bad year). breakdown. That sounds about right to me. I laugh when I clean up the dog crap every day and cry when I do pee-pee laundry and dishes, and everything else, every 5 minutes. The drone in my ears slowly died to a faint hum. Penny. When I told Joe about it, I said that working for free means taking time away from my family as I have to devote time to bring in grants to cover me otherwise. I went in and we waited for three hours to be seen. 8 Answers. Some of you will think I’m a baby, that this just comes with the territory of being a parent. Hi Katrina! Hello everyone. Twitter: @kalcorn My friend Jane* has a problem. My closest friends said I downplayed my nervous breakdown, making it sound like a really bad day (instead of a really bad year). In one survey I posted for working parents, 88% of the nearly 500 respondents said they had suffered stress-related health problems (like anxiety and depression) since having kids and going back to work. I didn't say this, but a couple of months ago I actually felt like I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Answer Save. A slightly updated version of this story appeared on The Huffington Post in Nov. 2010. a signal. I began feeling symptoms of anxiety that were kind of un-explanatory. I’ve heard about that, read a little about it. Lastly, I am focusing on how blessed I am and trying to enjoy life more. And we need more than emotional support, we need physical support. I was just talking to a friend this morning who was saying she feels fine when she’s working, and great when she’s just hanging out with her daughter, but absolutely TERRIBLE when she’s trying to do both at once. The job was extremely fast-paced and stressful, and very cut-throat, in my opinion. So what do you do? Perhaps this is true for some moms, like some sort of natural instinct, but even instincts can hurt you, especially when out of control. I’m me. Press | Events. It’s so hard to be a working mom. 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